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Superman Takes Honeymooners Too Seriously, Now Wanted for Murder

In a very disturbing development, Earth’s mightiest hero, Superman, is wanted for the murder of Lois Lane.

“We heard the two laughing inside Ms. Lane’s apartment, and then we heard a huge boom and crash,” said Lane’s neighbor. Apparently, the two had been watching the Honeymooners, and Superman got carried away with his Gleason impression.

Superman, currently in custody after turning himself in, had this to say: “I was just trying to fool around, but this one really got away from me. My life is now ruined by Jackie Gleason, and the love of my life is probably lying dead on the moon.”

The Flash has offered to run back through time in order to prevent Superman from committing this heinous crime, but was actually punched by Superman for the mere suggestion of altering the timeline again (apparently it was changed before), sending the Flash straight to the Moon with Lane. With the blood of these two friends on his hands, the public is now asking, “When does it end?”

The Batman commented on the situation saying, “Injustice. This is how it all starts,” causing public outcry about the cryptic statement.

On top of this, a missing persons report has been filed for the disappearance of Daily Planet reporter, Clark Kent, who was last seen trying to find Superman. More updates to come.

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